I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
oh god the rape fog is back!
and that's when the elephants and penises started dancing on the ceiling
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
they bought blue cups instead of red...wtf how am i supposed to pretend im on laguna beach??
Why do i always get involved with 3 women at once?
Because life brings drama and thus like moths to a flame, women
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
Oh, and trying to figure out who wants to do Molly in a frat is like asking damn children if they want puppies and candy. So just bring as much as possible.
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
I'm a wonderful, drunk angel of hydration and sometimes absinthe.
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
There is a car windscreen wiper in my handbag... Not my car's, not ok.
Why is there multiple peanut butter and toasts stuck to the fridge door?
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
Randomize
