i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
"too many" and "free shots" never belong in the same sentence
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
she has an amazing ass but I need more beers to get past her horse face. It works out perfect becauseI can use her teeth as a bottle opener.
NEW RULE: NO INNAPROPRIATE CHOICES THAT INVOLVE GUNS. I LIKE IT. WRITE THAT DOWN.
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision
I feel that the drunker I get, the drunker Facebook gets.
Bitch, it's 2 in the afternoon.
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
What the hell man, you basically stole my girlfriend with a bucket of KFC.
So? Find me, fuck me, then you can go to sleep and I'll leave.
Wow. That's the most amazing thing anyone has ever said to me.
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
Randomize
