You owe me 10 bucks. He wasnt in jail. Found him at 530 this morning when the smoke alarm went off. He passed out naked in the middle of cooking bacon. No idea where he was before that.
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
Hey, dude, is Kevin still passed out on your porch?
Yeah. I'm gonna go leave a pitcher of bloody mary next to him in case he's still alive.
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
Being a slave to ur dick is exhausting.
when i woke up with 300+ messages I didn't except them to be about coyotes and burning shoes.
His Australian accent during sex made me think I was in an Outback Steakhouse commercial
The one that slept in my truck and you peed in his face?
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
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