you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
that's like... drinking popov and saying its the worlds best vodka. you gotta try some others first. THERE SHOULD BE A MISS AMERICA PAGEANT. but like, mr penis. and they can do tricks and make unintelligent remarks and wear sparkly condoms.
I cannot tell if the couch is cold or I spilled beer. THAT kind of night.
Or maybe my penis is just the key to their locked boxes of crazy, and I unleash their wrath upon all of mankind just so I can get my nut off
I think people like me is why alcohol became illegal at one point
On the plus side I'm getting really good at painting the inside of a toilet with my bowels.
My boobs are numb because I've been using them as stress balls
You are the only person I know who has a fierce hatred for a five year old. Not even five year olds in general, yours is very specific
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
Just woke up and read the text that drunk me sent you, i take it all back, and you can't have my power puff girl pillow either.
Randomize
