i wonder why nobody wants to date me...im doing a crossword at work and asked out loud: whats a 4 letter word for 'a reason to get married?'
i was like PREG?
my boob sweat smells like rotting zombie flesh
is this your pickup line?
Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm still tasting pancake mix. I think this may actually be a serious medical problem...
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When you get home...find me in the shower. Only safe place at the moment.
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
You ran into the tattoo shop screaming PIERCE MY TITIES
Donald Trump looks like someone photoshopped hair onto a dick pic.
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
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