You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
he just payed for our date, after telling him I was leaving early to meet my fuck buddy. is there something lower than friendzone I can stick this guy in?
I took both his daughters virginities. There's no way he won't give me a job
Judging by the amount of alcohol multiplied by the amount of her exes here, tonight will be ending in tears.
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
Fuck off I wasn't that drunk. I was still able to toss froot loops in the air and catch them in my mouth.
And in your bra. It was quite entertaining.
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
I'm not fucking you with a Stormtrooper helmet on!
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
Randomize
