I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
I wish there was a hungover fairy to brush my teeth and bring me a diet coke.
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sorry for punching you in the face last night. I should have known the boxing gloves were a bad idea from the start.
Someone tried to flush pizza down the toilet. Well, at least tried to
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
Please take a moment of silence for the fact that I still have all 10 fingers
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just went through the Wendy's drive thru only wearing a towel. My life has hit an all time low
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
Remember that guy I fucked last month? Well I'm watching his dog this weekend while he's in the Bahamas with his girlfriend. What is my life
Turns out I tore my ACL when I fell off the mechanical bull.. Happy bday to me
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
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