He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
separated laundry into 'got laid' and 'didn't get laid' piles.
Ah that type of Dick. I think my phones trying to make me less of a whore by capitalizing Dick. That way it looks like I'm talking about a dude not penis
remember last night when you and I took turns yelling THIS IS HUGE in my dogs faces? I love wine night.
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
Time is so short and I miss you. (I just watched that commercial where the people all laugh and get older and die.)
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
Hey man, when I left for work she was laying on the couch naked cuddling your keurig, can you clean that mess up?
Sext me about skeletons
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
I FEEL LIKE HILARY MUST FEEL WHEN TRUMP MANSPLAINS AT HER
Randomize
