why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
no drinking for a week
if by week you mean tonight and by no you means yes
The cops showed up and one of them got pushed in the pool. When he got out he looked really sad so I got him a towel and hugged him. He arrested all the underage drunkards but me.
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
I got hammered with my chem professor at 4:30. I'm pretty sure that can't be topped by any real sort of institution.
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
Did he think I was flirting with him when I ordered a hot dog bc no
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work
I'm deleting Tinder. I got there he rubbed my back and then proceeded to jerk off on me.
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
Hahaha wearing a fake moustache in public was the best idea i ever had
Went to waffle house after dropping my sister off at school and got into a heated argument with a drunk/hungover philosophy professor I will not name. I won the argument.
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