just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
God dammit, you have a cape and I don't even have a fucking jacket.
Just tried to chase Captain Morgan with water...this whole drinking alone business is getting harder to do.
I feel like I just rode a horse, did a million jumping jacks, ran a marathon and need a carton on cigarettes. best sex hands down... EVER
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Weve literally been going out drinking five days a week. That counts as a full time job right?
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
I was the king of the handle race. My team finished it in 56 minutes.
you don't get it. Nobody wins a handle race. there just degrees of losing.
fat people need to stop using the handicapped bathroom stall so I can have sex in it. it's common logic
I had to puke in a ditch beside a cow pasture and like 50 cows just stood there and watched. I could feel the judgment.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
Nope. Turns put my desperate group message for sex didn't work out.
Well you sent it to two guys who were roommates.
They could have rock paper scissored for it. My vagina = the prize.
I'm about to smoke a joint alone, do you want to FaceTime and pretend you're smoking it too?
I mean seriously, she can have his dick anytime and im over here salivating like a thirsty bitch.
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
Randomize