I just shaved my vag with a razor my dad left when he was here a few months ago. Too hungover to think about the Freudian connotations
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
Dude he's your dog he doesn't love me more than you. I'm just like that cool uncle that takes him to burger king and to see girls.
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
Friends don't let friends put redi whip in their wine
I'm ready to get married, then we can lie around watching anime and eating pizza while he rubs baby oil on me
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
Today we memorialize my orgasms. Taken from me over six months ago, gone too soon. Here's to hoping we'll see one again
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
Was I just dreaming, or was there a corpse at work last night?
She was just sleeping.
Is it bad that I'm kind of disappointed by that?
Randomize