I don't wanna hook up with anyone from minnesota
everybody there reminds me of mashed potatoes... white and lumpy
The only comparison I have for the iPhone is that it's like youre constantly getting a blow job
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Should i put up a tasteful banner for your party that says last chance to sleep with maya?
I'm stoned at 1030am, watching Maury with my exboyfriend. I need to make better choices with my life.
I smell like icyhot and vodka... Heres to my pulled tendon.
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
Hired a new intern today and we have something in common. I blew her boyfriend in high school. Do you think she knows?
HAMMERED.. I made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with toilet paper instead of bread...
you fell asleep with her panties on your face. how are you surprised??
Adulthood is putting your bongs in the dishwasher because you're too lazy to clean them manually.
Are you ok dude?
It was like he was 23 all over again. Madness. I. was. so. scared.
Randomize