He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
i felt like the dude nobody likes from the mikes hard lemonade commercial
I'm really sorry we tried to have sex on top of you last night.
This is a mass text. First one to reply gets head.
Before anyone claims this, this chick is in my boyfriend's phone as "Worst BJ EVER!"
Does that mean you're calling dibs or can I?
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
3 2 1 whiskey
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
Bud... Did you mean to tweet a picture of your dick? If not just letting you know.
If there is a heaven, that's what it will be. Bagel Bites and cunnilingus.
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
Thanks for DJing my sex last night. You were on point 💜
Let me atleast have my coffee before you start talking about your penis
Randomize
