Kareoke will never be a sober sport
yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
he kept kneeing me like he was playing footsies... only then i realized it was his dick.
My "High Times" magazine came in today, as well as my girlfriend's new sex toys. We're calling in sick today.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
I'm playing wingman, but I want to pull a Goose and die.
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
Uh oh. Middle aged belly dancers. And they just got out swords. Shit is about to get real.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
I brought him flowers on my way home from cheating on him. Boyfriend of the year award right here.
We've given up. My vagina is tired of constant lonely nights and disappointments. This is our retirement.
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
I mean, the night I fell out of that bus I made you pour vodka onto my wound to clean it, then duct taped a paper towel to my hand and kept drinking.
I just came rly close to telling a dude that I want to chew on him and there should be an oil painting of his ass up in the louvre before I realized that isn't how flirting is supposed to go
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