Let's just say there is a bloody hand print above my bed and it's not mine. Literally.
he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
I just rubbed my dick on something in your apartment. Can you guess what?
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
last karaoke night = doing dmx songs with a guy who threatened to stab me. so yeah I'm coming out.
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
I have vodka, fruit gushers, and health insurance. Let's party.
So my step mom just informed me she tells stories about me at work as a form of birth control for the girls that work there, not sure if i should be offended or proud.
Randomize
