OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
The old woman next to me on the el smells like cupcakes...but she doesn't taste like cupcakes
fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
1. No more tequila 2. Why do you let me say slutty things? 3. I woke up and our apartment was covered in cake? 4. Love you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, I just went to take a piss and looked at my ballsack... Underneath was labled "L" and "R"
he kept doing his monologue, "if a vagina could talk."
So my girlfriend used a threesome to tell me she wanted to leave me for a girl... Not entirely sure how I should feel about that.
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
I could've eaten a live cat and wouldn't remember it today. That level of drunk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ryan learned the all important lesson tonight; Red Bull gives you wings, Jaeger gives you gravity.
We're at the urgent care down the street from you if you care to stop by
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
If you're ever desperate for a guy's #, ask him to call your lost cell phone so you can find it. Some genius used that on me last night. FML
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
After an hour of searching for my pants, we had three people looking. They were finally found in the oven.
Randomize