so i'm just gonna leave my credit card in your mailbox so you can bail me outta jail.. deal?
dude totally just got the jungle juice out of my white top. i am really ready to be a trophy wife.
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
you finished all 5 burgers, started crying tears of joy, and then claimed the tears were actually just 'meat sweats' from your eyes
he locked me out then poked me with a fork when i tried to get in through the window
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
They installed a lotion dispenser in the bathroom at work... its like they want me to masturbate on the clock...
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
I bet, I woke up to you like naked at 4 in the morning shoving a sandwich in your face
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
I'm sure the lady doing my pedicure could smell the sex on me.
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
Just find a separated / divorcing man. They’re too upset to fall in love, too helpless to be alone and too horny to think straight. Smile at him the right way and he’ll be thrilled to be with a sexy younger woman!
Randomize
