I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room
Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this
Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
Everything went well, until I walked into his bedroom and there was a Ronald Reagan poster watching over his bed - creepy
Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
he legitimately fell asleep standing up at the club. everyone was impressed
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
she was drinking until 3, woke up at 7, shouted 'I'M STILL DRUNK" and went out for a jog in her thong
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
I am lonely and hungry. I need a girlfriend, but I'd settle for my mom.
Can you not touch my dick while I'm holding a gecko?
Drunk Karaoke resulted in only 8 injuries this time, so there is some improvement.
I sent her a dick pic and used brett Favre's dick pick. She asked me why I had pictures of old men's dicks saved on my phone... I just can't win bro
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
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