Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
I cant remeber how long i've been laying here...it could be 10 minutes to a fucking day
Day two of vacation and my first drink of the day is a plan b colada
her roommate was in the bathroom for over an hour so i volunteered to take the dog out and i shit in the bushes
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
The water at the venue tasted HORRIBLE so I just kept drinking booze. It was like the medievals.
Grass is always greener, Allison, grass is always greener
The grass is drunker and I'm lying down on it
As if I wouldn't steal Nintendo brand "Mario is my HOMEBOY!" boxers when he gave me the entire drawer to choose from.
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
She came home, put on the news, left a 20 minute drunk message on her friends machine, then proceeded to play back the entire message laughing hysterically and then just passed out
I just caught my bangs on fire trying to lite a bowl while driving. Thank god it wasn't my eyebrows like last time.
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
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