i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
Dude its 315 and I'm sitting here eating slices of cheese. Don't talk to me about tomorrow.
You sent her a pic of your dick with 'guess what you cant have anymore' written on it with a marker.
Somehow after we left in 3 different cars to all go to different places we still all ended up in the emergency room
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You need to always be prepared. Like a sex firefighter.
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
It really went downhill when you started writing IOU on pieces of napkins. Giving them to the strippers
Real life dumb and dumber
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's cute. And her snoring noises remind me of the incidental music from Jaws.
Just me, my martini, and my backup Martini.
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
I'm armed with nothing but $4 lip gloss gum and my phone. Ready to take on the fucking world.
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
I'm a peeled potato compared to her. I'm a peeled potato compared to anyone. I'm a peeled potato.
Are you high?
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