You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
Ive either hit rock bottom or become my own hero.
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
My boyfriend just sent me flowers. I am now crying at the fact i fucked my fat neighbor. God please help me.
Drunk me thought he was hot enough to overlook the fact that he had poison ivy and still have sex with him. Sober me wants to know if you have any calamine lotion.
I think you begin to realize how unfair life really is when you're high and you discover that the new box of fruit by the foot on your shelf is actually empty
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
My VP dropped me off at the Strip Club in Houston. Just said "I was never here".
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
Also there's so much vodka on my breath that if I blew on my fingers my nail polish would fall right off
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
my liver is dry heaving
I just loudly threatened to kill a self checkout machine
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
Randomize
