Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
I don't even have to sign up for karaoke at duncans anymore. The karaoke ppl just sign me up themselves. Without my consent. I also sang stacys mom to some lady named Stacy who's mom died yesterday.
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
Please talk me out of ordering the stripper pole for a dollar. Please.
Next person that gets my dog drunk is paying to have my carpet cleaned. I am tired of getting up to pee and stepping in dog barf.
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
She tied her key to her bra the night before and couldn't get it off while trying to open the door this morning so she just took her bra off and let it tangle from the key while unlocking the door...the old Indian couple next door were shocked.
The party invite said "this ain't no lame stoplight party, you come to hookup or you don't come" I feel like their honesty deserves out attendance
Not to mention having our pick at the ensuing sausagefest
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
Got a high five from a Superman stripper tonight
You're breaking my sexual little heart
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
I'm like a sensual ninja. You turn your head for a second and.... BOOM I'm naked. It's like a naughty magic trick.
We were driving past a farm when he screamed at me to stop the car, then he jumped out and tried to ride a cow.
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