is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
Sorry I had passed out by this time I think, with the chicken fingers ON my face in my bed, with all the lights on, and ketchup all over.
No I'm not proud of you for not sleeping with him. He has herpes. You don't get a gold star for behaving how you're expected to. Trust me. I'm a teacher.
He showed up 3 hours late wearing roller skates and acted like nothing was wrong with that.
The bar owner gave me permission to push people into the pool. I'm never going to leave Los Angeles
She passed out in his mom's bed and when we went to go get her she went 'no its cool I live here'.
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for?
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
I'm going to preface tonight by saying that I'm sorry for tequila, shopping carts, and having to chase me.
My roommate taped his phone to the ceiling fan to simulate walking so he could hatch Pokémon. Lazy people will always find a way.
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
Randomize
