Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
Should we pre-order food to the ER for cinco de mayo?
He asked me if we could throw a lingerie party together so I guess he's single again
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
Pro tip: if you can avoid puking on your carpet, do so. Cleaning it up is absolutely no fun at all.
My sister's exploding appendix just cock blocked me...
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
Note to Self: Never again eat a weed brownie by yourself two hours before a tornado warning in your exact location.
This is a weird combination of planning and sexting but whatever
I'd just like to take a moment now to apologize sincerely for getting drunk and making an as of myself at your Christmas party next week. I'm especially sorry for sleeping with your baby sister.
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
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