Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
I just found ouut you can get a DUI in a kayak. Fuck.
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
while i was sleeping he changed my screen saver to his dick with a heart frame around it. I just might be falling in love.
Golf group in front of us has 2 hooker caddies. One guy was getting a lap dance as he waited to tee off. Only in vegas.
You're not stopping till I see you on the ground trying to hold on to shit
A bee came out of the shoe box and stung her. Even the insect community doesn't want her in those hideous things.
possible new low: just washed a permanent marker penis off my cheek with porta-potty hand sanitizer.
also if this is gonna be a sample of how country jam will be, I might as well break up with him now. he spent the night blacked out and I could have been in a three-some.
I need to reevaluate. My boss gave me drug money. I overslept on my couch. And I had my student teacher go to McDonald's and get an egg mcmuffin for me.
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
I threw up in the middle of a bar last night and still managed to get laid! Happy thanksgiving!
Welcome aboard the S.S. struggle. I'll be your captain for today's voyage and Jeremy is your first mate. Just sit back and relax while we navigate the seas of drunken regret. Your forecast for the day is violently hungover with a chance of "shit, that really did happen!"
Randomize
