what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
on the list of things id be doing when i was almost 30, waiting for a girl to finish shitting the bed wasn't on there.
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
I just saw a fat chick ask the bartender to top her corona off with grenandine cuz she has a "sweet tooth" no that's diabetes fatty
She was wearing my robin hood hat from Halloween shouting "steal from the rich and give to the poor, mothafuckaaaaas." We are taking her everywhere.
I told the DJ last night to play Third Eye Blind before 1:45 and just pointed at him as I walked away. He didn't do it and at 1:45 I just walked out pointing at him, without my friends
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
Are you planning on wandering into construction sites drunk and falling down 6' holes?
probably
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
did you know that sneaking into a golf course at midnight is a felony? the cop made sure to tell us after she peed on the course and hit on him
Randomize
