Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
i thought to myself 'what a productive day'. then i realized all ive done is one load of laundry and shaved my balls.
His shopping cart was nothing but malt liquor and zucchini.
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
I don't want the last thing I hear while alive to be Jesse's Girl
I feel the need to send all my exes pictures of penises larger than theirs. Because they all must suffer.
It was darkish out, I was shit faced, and they should have marked the electric fence a little more clearly. The entire wedding reception saw me run full force into it
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
To the person who put the glitter on my ceiling fan...fuck you
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
I don't think you could pull off being mean.
How do you think I'm still single?
Randomize
