No idea how I passed that sobriety test.
he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
Something growled at me in your dark backyard last nt. Hoping it was my landwalking laser sharks and not Andy.
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"
I just got nudes while talking in the third person. Not sure if I Should be proud or ashamed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
that's what I'm here for. I'm literally just bad advice mixed with motivational sentences.
Joke’s on you. I got to talk to a furry about why nukes are bad and why musicals are good.
Its the damn oven. I think it wants to eat me.
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
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