why did i make a hit list last night containing only McDonalds?
you tried to order a magarita mcflurry and when they said they didnt make those you tried to call 911
I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
you'll be glad to know I got kicked off the microphone at a bar in Breckenridge last night thanks to my country rendition of all star
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he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
I've reached the gravitational age where it's very hard to get my face and my boobs in the same shot without some kind of yoga involved .
And then he serenaded me with "Pimps don't cry" from 'The Other Guys'. If that's not love I'm not sure what is
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
Is it wrong for me to wish my cat had arms to get me a beer?
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