Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
first missing my period. then crying at the clinic... but why?
we had sex 3 months ago. you missed your period 2 weeks ago. but nice try.
I acted like I was still sleeping as she gathered her stuff to leave.. that's when she let one rip
and if it starts getting weird im just going to tell him i used to be a man
mom asked me why i'm never sober at family events, i told her i learned it from her.
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
Shes been standing with her arms crossed in front of the mirror for 45 minutes...she told me she's "getting sober"
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
I asked her politely not to touch my dick
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
You were out of control then you fell asleep on his lap for 30 min and woke up civil. Way to powernap to sobriety!
So drunk me is not subtlety trying to get her boss to cheat on her husband and have a lesbian affair with me. Sober me is ok with that.
Randomize
