so the chest pain/shortness of breath/overdose guy we just took to tm hospital is now running down market street from the police in a gown holding his iv.
That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
When you get home there will be live fish in the bathtub. I did not put live fish in the bathtub.
I caved man... I fucked her so vigorously, desperately trying to correct her wonky eye. My determination was relentless.
You are a terrible person.
I just try to be optimistic...
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
I'm just the girl with the breathalyzer keychain, and I embrace that.
do you think there's enough of the fabric you gave me to make a crop top for a cat?
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
I'm like a sensual ninja. You turn your head for a second and.... BOOM I'm naked. It's like a naughty magic trick.
Randomize
