worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
Today let's steal peoples pets out of their backyards and leave ransom notes
I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
I'm fucking an ugly guy. Don't come home.
well now I have to
I'd love to sympathize with you but I'm drunk in a mansion
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
My mom wants to know what to send you in a care package. She used cat emojis, so you know it's serious
I smoked that joint really fast and now I'm so high I'm crawling around on all 4 giving my dogs piggie back rides pretending its the macy day parade for dogs and I'm their giant human float.
We've been staking out a taco bell for 2 hours trying to find last night's one night stand
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
Nah, just stick him in a closet with some cheetos, a blunt and soda. The darkness will calm him down until Mallory can be located.
Randomize
