he confessed his love for me, threw up on my pillow and then fell asleep on said pillow. i met him last night.
better than last weekend. things are really looking up for you.
News update: stealing a playground is harder than it looks.
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
Hey my vagina is like a company. Everyone has an equal opportunity....
She apologized again the next day. I said it was pee under the bridge
How many other adults do you think have slept naked under the Winnie the Pooh blanket sober?
If he doesn't give you the same feelings you get when the pizza guy arrives, he's probably not worth it.
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
The moment when you go to plug in someone else's phone in your car and your lube is in the way. Don't mind that it's just my center console car lube. Normal.
i smell like vinegar and tequila i can feel the old people behind me judging
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
Randomize
