I found your undies. They were wrapped around my leg.
just come out here and I will go home with you...
I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Plus she can make a mean sandwich! That's all I really need. Well that and foot jobs...
he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
the fucking easter bunny is here. he just made 3 cups in a row. no one knows who he is..
I think I've hugged the toilet more times than I've hugged my own family members.
I love you. Thanks for all the blowjobs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
I just instagramed a picture of an ostrich in case you were wondering what I did with my night
I caught myself caressing my own hand while nurturing a glass of bourbon. I think it's time to get back out there.
I just want a simple guy who likes cats, tattoos, and doing coke off my tits.
I guess what I'm trying to get to is that my dog sneezed on my dick earlier and its really taken the joy out of my evening.
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