god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
you kept making us tell you how cute you looked in your new outfit, even after you threw up all over it
Being this Hungover on Easter has brought my closer to Jesus... I swear he had to feel shitty like this after coming back from the dead
oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
Okay good. And who the fuck put a condom on my foot. That shit hurt
I've just stalked all the hot guys who have clicked "attending". I now know which guys are "yes", "maybe" and "no". I only hope my drunk self remembers.
Walked up in time to hear him say "you saw I was in a relationship on facebook? So why are you holding my nuts?" To her. That's loyalty man
I'm praying that the company stray cat shows up tomorrow. I think I may have hit it while leaving Friday. Nobody will believe it was an accident after I hit the last one.
Dress was in bathroom covered in shards of glass, earrings on living room floor, bracelet still missing, purse in backyard. The cast of Princess Bride all left the bar to make sure I was ok. Perfect night
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
I think I was just motorboated by a 4-year old girl.
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
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