What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
I hooked up with a Michael Jackson impersonator last night. Too soon?
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
she was sobbing drunk in the backseat about her dead cat and how the guy in the front seat didn't want to hook up with her
i woke up to the sound of my dad getting blown. this is my life
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
you can think of my virginity as your little souveneir from our relationship.
What's a quick way to get over an ex-boyfriend? To hear about how he threw up in a cup and then drank it. That's how.
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
It was his birthday and he drunkenly offered me Portillo's and diamonds in exchange for a snap chat of my boobs. Even sober it seemed like a good idea at 3 in the morning.
I dealt with the imported moonshine, but when the cocaine came out, I had to get the fuck out of there
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
that awkward moment when you use blowjob jokes as a segue into coming out as bi
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
I party with great urgency now.
Randomize
