Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
New boss looks like john cusack in a collar. Hot. Why do i always want to have sex with priests?
Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
a queef is a wish your heart makes.
I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed.
yeah that always happens. i'm like the where's waldo of parties. i never even know where the fuck i'm at.
i'm satisfied with the level of pretty that his new girlfriend isn't.
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
My ex just sent me a message asking if she could blow me, but only if we get caught by her new bf. If she promises to swallow I'm doing it.
Sign she's a keeper: "I would rather be late to brunch than waste a perfectly good boner."
Walk of shame. Stopped at an estate sale on the way back to the house. Old lady pulled a condom wrapper of the back of my hoodie. beat that
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
It's a little weird that I'm blowing my wingman.
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
Meeting up with one of your students at your drug dealers house is always an awkward moment
Randomize
