I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
Just shot my load on a stink bug. Thought you should know.
he found you with your pants down, trying to straddle the urinal. no one should have to see their sister like that. ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
Hey where the fuck is the rest of my beer? Lets start this day off right
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
I'm trying. I feel like we're trying to have sex with fruitcake. dry and boring.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
He wants to buy us a microwave. Clearly the man is going to fix my life.
You know you've found a good drug dealer when he's willing to overnight mail to you in another state...
She was here for a threesome... She doesn't have to put the new roll of toilet paper on the dispenser. She can leave the new roll wherever she wants!
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