Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
My poor mother should have just stuffed me back up her vagina when she had the chance.
Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
there should be a national holiday dedicated to how high i am
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
Within 24 hours, I went to a feminist documentary screening with two state reps and you hate fucked a rent-a-cop on the helipad of your hospital. Somewhere our lives went in different directions.
I still make more money.
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
Come over. We have half a bottle of jumbo champagne left and no boyfriends to slow us down
You sealing the pinky promise with a shot was much better than just kissing it
It was like Lady and the Tramp, but just tramp and the tramp. And instead of spaghetti and meatballs, we had whiskey and cups
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
Randomize
