i woke up with socks on this morning
so?
i didnt wear socks last night
My life would be so much easier if i could just ride around in the cash cab all day
by the end of the night i am guaranteed to have less of a face than Seal....
She called me Spock and proceeded to ask me to 'teach her the ways of the force'. I just couldn't do it after that. No way am I fucking a girl who can't tell the difference between Star Wars and Star Trek.
I just ate a whole bag of celery instead of getting up to get a glass of water. That high.
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
Im gonna get home and destroy this bag of chicken nuggets with my soul.
If it wasn't for the fact that I drink during my lunch break I'm pretty sure I would have quit this job by now
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
Randomize
