I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
Woke up in the front yard with a chalupa and a firecracker in my back pocket. It's what the founding fathers would want
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
Ew. After that you just pretty much proved that your vagina is the reason why my vagina needs two toilet seat covers when peeing in public restrooms
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
Your mankini haunted my dreams.
In my defense I didn't know there was concrete on the other side of that fence when I tossed him over it.
You're both fucking idiots and this is why I should never let you two drink alone.
Seriously, I really just burned my nipple making ravioli.. I'd explain, but no reasoning makes this acceptable:/
It true. It written in the Bible.
Yes I remember that, right next to the passage where jesus said unto his disciples, pop molly, fuck bitches amen
From now on he's gonna have to shave first. It feels like I got eaten out by a chainsaw!
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
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