No awkward lesbian experiences without me
he wasnt into me til he saw how good i was at ms pacman. wtf why does this always happen? when she kisses pacman it was a little awkward, so i made my move. i went for more than one kind of banana last night!
i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
im laying here in the parking lot drinking a warm coke, prob still drunk, feeling like i need to apologize to everyone i know
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
She started puking and I started running and I swear to god there was a wave of vomit chasing me down the stairs.
She gave us all a pep talk at the bus stop at 1 AM. It involved cupcakes and somehow ended with her making out with her best friend. God bless college.
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
Seriously, you just banged the guy that wishes his dog happy birthday on fb. That's fucking adorable!
How does one tell their boyfriend they're pregnant with someone else's kid??
Randomize
