I want to touch your soul through your body...with my penis...
Mike i'm at church right now...
Say something about gay babies.
She said if it slipped out one more time she was going to duct tape it in her vagina
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
she fucked me tho cuz it was her cat's birthday. As soon as we were done she just says "ahhh tequila tuesdays"
Just found out my ex boss was running a whore house in the bar. Time to remove her as a reference?
My stomach literally has no contents left. Tequila cleanse=success.
I want a calm night. Not one where I wake up to you topless and bloody.
Right, try not to commit a felony that costs more than 4 dollars cause that's all I have in my bail jar.
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
Just text him and be like do you want this pussy or not. You have three seconds to respond.
Omg my butt feels so much better. Those suppositories are magic. It feels like Jesus fingered me in my sleep.
I just got yelled at by a stripper for being a tease.
I thought i was doing pretty well but I walked into my first class and everyone on my side of the room immediately asked how drunk and high I was
Randomize
