so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
The entire time I'm blowing him she's in the back seat lecturing me on the reasons why you're not suppose to do that while they're driving...
WHY. COME BACK. TRAPPED WITH ROOMMATE AND FALCON. SAVE ME. I HAVE HUMMUS.
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How did it go last night?
Woke up head half shaved and a burrito? So good and bad?
How many strippers in the world do you think have had a debate with someone about the NRA?
Also, I've found a new way to get drunk at work for free. Everytime I make a bushwhacker and there's extra... I put it in a cup. Its the Never ending drink.
Selling our snow shovel to buy more beer. Not your brightest idea.
I'm sure the lady doing my pedicure could smell the sex on me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So you're at your daughter's volleyball game looking at dicks online? That's amazing.
No, I was picking her up from volleyball and sitting in my car looking at dicks.
The twitch Bob Ross stream is the happiest little hangover cure ever.
I was the oldest, shortest, and soberest at the New Years party last night. My life sucks
You can't just say "I scored us a potential threesome" and then not text me back.
Which sister was it? The one I accidentally hit when my shoe flew off or the one I ate candy off of when we were high?
You know you're old when you’re masturbating and you pull your hip
Randomize