I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
remember when you told me, jokingly, to not get jizz on your shirt that i borrowed last night?
I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
It is 8 o'clock in the morning and there is already blood all over one of the stalls in the bathroom. What has your St. Patrick's day done for you?
I'm drinking screwdrivers in the pool naked. Call 911 if I don't check in regularly
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
"But puppies!" Is not an acceptable excuse for trying to drunkenly steal someone's dog, you promiscuous midget!!
think I signed up for a 5k last night while blackout.
And if it ever comes down to tax or healthcare benefits we can get married
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
I feel sorry for the person who's phone number is 704-1776 cause from now on I'm giving that number to every guy I never wanna talk to again. Happy Independence Day
You know it's been a rough week when you funnel beers by yourself.
Eating pizza in the bath tub while watching a romantic comedy alone. I reached a new level of single.
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
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