you could never motorboat her...you'd have to motor-titanic her
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
Why am I the only one concerned that there's a dog in the movie theatre?
found out that hot proper business chick in my class A) did a bar crawl last 2 night and still showed up to class and B) is 19 and C) so not as proper as I thought D) is single. How the fuck does that work? Freaking superwoman.
He said you stopped mid-fuck, called fives on his dick, walked out to grab another drink, and came back.
Walking out of the bathroom and not knowing you have hand soap on the front of your pants so it looks like you blew a load on yourself really sets the tone for the rest of the week...
The site I use to study flash cards keeps showing ads for truck companies hiring drivers. It's like the site is saying "hey, we all know there's no hope for you, just give up and Become a truck driver."
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
I broke my dick don't ask me how I need help putting in a catheter so I can piss.
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