just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
Please explain to me why I only attract Mormon guys. Just explain that to me.
I think it's God trying to counter your lustful nature. Imagine if Agnostics liked you. You'd never come out of your bedroom.
I am watching Grease 2 and properly learning how to apply a condom to a banana. This is a sign from God that this is the closest I will ever get to having the need for one.
You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
I'm on a cruise to the Bahamas and this text message is gunna cost me $10 but I need you to pray on my behalf for the things I'm about to do these 2 girls and what I did last night to a 35 year old mother of 3.
I thought of you while cleaning the forehead prints off my glass doors.
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
I don't mean to insult you, but did you leave your training bra in my bedroom last night?
(540): I ran 10 miles and then took a dump behind a rock. What the fuck have you done with a hangover that's comparable?
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
I have a sixth sense for dads free balling in gym shorts
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
I just turned down a booty call because I'm having a Star Wars movie marathon
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
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