just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
at first i was on the bathroom floor cuz i was hungover. now im just here because it is cool
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
Is he gonna be my crazy ex? Cause we weren't even together for as long as my weeklong bicurious lesbian relationship.
I am on my usual post-jerkoff high of eternal happiness. Like I could punch a fucking tiger.
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
bullshit you weren't drunk, you pointed at me and said my cigarette was empty
Snow days are when you really appreciate that your neighbor is on your bang roster.
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
Explain to me how we're not being documented on? A gynecologist I saw two times 8 years ago popped up on my people you may know list on fb. What in the actual fuck?
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
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