Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
What I lack in compassion I make up for in lack of compassion
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
they hired a photographer to take a family portrait for grandmas bday gift. we just hired a male stripper. we are def the better grandkids.
I may have made out with a tranny last night, which, if I don't get fired for everything else that happened, really makes last night epic.
If you were awake I would probably ride my bike over, fuck you like a god, leave you in the wonders of life, and bike home
The words "me," "sober," and "new years eve" do not go together. Ever.
It has been so long since I got any action that I have decided to change my vagina's name from "the chamber of judgement" to "the cave of forgotten dreams".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We found you wrapped up in a tarp in the garage the next morning, thats how real shit got.
No we didn't fuck. He picked me up I asked where we were going and he said "I don't know if you've ever heard of a little place called Denny's?" He was completely serious. I told him to stop the car and I got out and called Jack.
WHY DOES MY BOYFRIEND'S BROTHER HAVE TO BE SO FUCKING HOT
My dad accidentally texted me asking if I had weed...
Maybe you should say yes, and you guys can like bond or something...
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
I asked him if we were exclusive and he followed up with, "If a tree falls in the woods and no ones around, does it still make a sound?" Wtf am I supposed to do with that?!
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