Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
Words of wisdom-never eat a peanut-butter covered banana on a construction site ever again
My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
i just woke up to seventeen texts from you saying all the things you would have done for a french fry.
I think forcing your little sister to drink with you on a Wednesday when she has school the next day is the low point of alcoholism.
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
Apparently he crashed because 3 different girls were trying to give him road head at the same time.
We're using joints as your birthday candles
My hair is crimped, I am walking with a roadie, and my vibrator is in my purse. I feel sorry for tomorrow.
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
dude his girlfriend left the meanest shit just marinating in our toilet. I'm gonna have to snap chat this out, theres no other option. prepare yourself
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
Most drunken moment of the night is me pouring Chanel no. 5 all over your boobs and rubbing it in...
Life achievement unlocked: I just ate a Slim Jim "Lady and the Tramp" style with a guy in a bar.
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