Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
sometime during the course of last night, i decided to get donuts for this morning. i'm a fucking genius when i smoke.
Hey when you come over to pick me up in the mornin bring a camera. This is going to be legendary. Don't knock.... They might cover up
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
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sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
I lost all interest the day she banged that guy in the Amazon parking lot. That's a special kinda whore.
I'm actually glad the whole thing's over now. It's exhausting to fake a pregnancy.
Imagine not having to fake it.
Yeah, I should never have kids, probably.
Places I vomited today: hotel bathroom, in the cab to the airport, airport bathroom, airport terminal trashcan, plane seat 18E, and the plans bathroom
Fun wedding?
Yes. Very.
Of course he did! You’ve seen my tits, you know he didn’t stand a chance!
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