You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
oh, also, we're locked out of the house and we're going to have to take shelter with the hot, poss single, dad next door. i hope this turns into a porno
she woke up with a sticky ear
we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
handjobs have no place on a baseball diamond
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
The best part is every argument that she makes from here on out will be refuted by "Oh hey remember that time you shit yourself wearing someone else's sweatpants at a frat party?"
I promised myself in the hospital that I would give up drinking for however long the cast stayed on. Thank god it was only soft tissue and not a fracture.
I woke up with my earring stuck inbetween my tits. Somehow you fucked my earring out and my boobs saved it. I'm pretty impressed with both of us right now.
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
She is carving a little coffin out of some wood for her hamster that died. I'm flying home tonight.
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
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