Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
Iced coffee. Banana. Two dumps. Life is good.
you'll be glad to know I got kicked off the microphone at a bar in Breckenridge last night thanks to my country rendition of all star
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
apparently i saved myself a memo last night titled "cake" and all it says is "i love it so much"
I hope I take a shit on your face in your dreams tonight.
Around noon tomorrow come looking for me. I'll be on Mill wearing whatever clothes I haven't lost yet. DO NOT REPLY. DO NOT ASK QUESTIONS. JUST DO IT.
She is the absolute last thing I would want to screw. Honestly. Fellating a porcupine. Higher on the list.
Dude too much vodka. I think I just puked up my heart
That's what you get for taking that guy home. The god of sluttiness is frowning upon you.
Just went to my first strip club and they had Fox News on. Conservative booty time.
At some point, you're going to have to talk to a tree and do what it says
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
Randomize
