just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
a guy in a toll booth on I-90 told me to fuck off for not being a red sox fan. i am going to miss massachusetts very much.
my life is in even more shambles than last time, mcdonalds is closed
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
I just had to MC for a middle school event with jizz on my dress. I'm going to hell.
Fuck a-yeah! I just found a wine key. Let 'Don't Fuck With Me Friday' commence.
Witnessing a crazy lady on the bus screaming about how romney is one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse.
Breaking a step ladder over someone's back turned into a really fun game, way too quickly.
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
Alex I've come up with a new medical condition. dick depression. it's a real thing and I have it
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
Sorry my phone died because I decided charging my vibrator was way more important
I peed in front of kids, unfortunately
Randomize
