hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
what the fuck were we smoking when we had a conversation about how my brother would be so proud if i fucked an orange alien?!?
is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
i just ate a whole pizza and threw it back up in the time span of 13 minutes. give me the number to guiness book of world records.
I put bits of fruit cocktail in the jello shots i made because i knew that they were gonna be the only thing we ate all day
Just when I thought he had turned a new leaf, I see a "Let me get you pregnant" shirt in his closet
You just kept screaming "PLEASE YELL CORNDOG AT HIM. PLEASE. CORNDOG."
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
Not sure if your roommate speaks German while sleeping, or if she woke up, figured out we were fucking, and used German to swear at us.
He described his sex dream about me using only emojis
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
I'll give you another blowjob if you bring me some cake.
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
If you ever get divorced...would you call me??
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